Life is hard. It’s meant to be that way.
Without life being hard, we wouldn’t have any lessons to learn from it. In order for us to appreciate the feeling of happiness, we need to understand what it feels like to be sad or angry.
If life were easy, then solving life’s problems would be easy too. This is not the case though, most of life’s problems worth solving is much harder than we often anticipate. For us to truly and comfortably answer some of life’s great mysteries, we need to be willing to dig much deeper than we could have imagined.
With all of our problems, we cannot simply focus on the problem itself, we have to be willing to dig deeper.
To illustrate what I mean and for the sake of this article; I’m going to use myself as an example;
I may have a problem being honest and I may have identified that my constant lies are only working to my detriment. So I tell myself, today I’m going to consciously try my hardest not to be dishonest!
“Just for today, I will be honest! Just for today, I will be honest!”
That may work for a few days, but eventually, I will start lying again.
Why? Because I have only focused on the problem itself, rather than focusing on the cause of the problem. The problem is that I’m constantly being dishonest, in fact the problem is quite clear. Identifying the problem won’t take that problem away; it’s merely the first step of working on that problem. What really matters though is the REASON why I’m being dishonest.
Once we identify the reasons behind our actions, only then do we actually begin working on our problems
- Was I perhaps scared to tell the truth, in other words; is the reason behind my constant lying fear based?
- Was I perhaps worried about what people might think of me if I were to tell the truth? Is my pride holding me back from speaking my truth?
- Was I scared that I would be rejected if I spoke the truth?
The reality is, lying is not the problem. Lying is the defense mechanism. The real problem is the reason why I would lie. Only once I start addressing those issues do I start addressing the problem itself.
Have you been faced with some really difficult problems of late. More importantly, upon reflection, how have you dealt with them?